The One That Could Have Been

Here are my reasons: -Fat Monica dating ultra boring doctor guy (“Can anyone name a well-known seed that has been masquerading as a nut?”) -Rachel trying to sleep with Joey then vomiting and just sleeping on his couch -Monica giving her “flower” to Chandler -Chandler being Joey’s assistant…having to wear Joey’s pants to break them in, getting the right kind of orange juice -Fat Monica dancing between Parts 1 and 2 -Ross constantly trying to get Carol to have sex with him and using karate to numb the pain -Phoebe being in stocks and smoking and telling her assistant that Brandy is a dumb name and she will call her Joan, lol. Then upon firing her, saying she was gonna miss Joan.

BEST QUOTES Ross: This morning was fun, huh? Me hopping in on you in the shower there. Carol: Yeah! And maybe someday we could get a place with two bathrooms.

After hiring Chandler as his assistant, Joey: All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I don’t need any assistance in there, take a break!

Phoebe: Ohh that’s so sweet! (Her cell phone rings.) Oh! Hang on! (Quickly grabs a cigarette and starts to light it as her phone rings.) Hang onnnnnn!!! (Gets the cigarette lighted and answers the phone.) (On phone.) Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when it hits 50! 5-0, it’s a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, it’s okay. It’s okay, you’re allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.

Rachel: Oh my God! You’re a 30-year-old virgin! Monica: Say it a little louder! I don’t think the guy all the way in the back heard you. Guy All The Way In The Back: Yeah, I heard it.

Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? That are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what can only be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym! Rachel: Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife is (whispers) gay. Ross: She is not…(Realizes) She’s gay. Oh my God. She is so gay!