The Brendan Leonard Show

Michael Carney: 30% of teens love Rotang, but the other 75% just don’t understand him. Brendan Leonard: So, we’re working in terms of 105%? Michael Carney: I’m not a history major, Brendan.

Michael Carney: Inanimate cone! Who are you dating?

Michael Carney: Your eyes remind me of onions and that says a lot because I’m lactose intolerant.

Brendan Leonard: Are you calling me a liar? Are my pants on fire? Is my nose as long as a telephone wire? I don’t have time for this!

Michael Carney: You’re nice in a non-threatening way.

Cameraman: Kevin, did you eat mud today? Kevin Carlson: Of course I did.

Kevin Carlson: I didn’t like anybody’s wigs, to be frank. But I’ll be Kevin, so I’ll give it a 6.

Michael Carney: [writing a letter at Camp Jinx!] Dear Mom, you said there wasn’t going to be any water sports at camp. Well guess what? Brendan said we’re going WATER skiing this afternoon. You lied to me, Mom.

Kevin Carlson: My greatest fear is that the African dining squirrel might have already dined. That would be terrible.

Brendan Leonard: We’re gonna go to our correspondent on the field, Kevin Sheehan. Kevin Sheehan: Yes, I am in a field. That is why I am a correspondent on the field.