A figure of speech that uses an unexpected ending to a series or phrase. For example:
“The car stopped on a dime, which unfortunately was in a pedestrian’s pocket.”
“Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.”
Where there's a will, I want to be in it. "I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat." — Will Rogers "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it." — Groucho Marx "Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana." — Groucho Marx "I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my father, not screaming and terrified like his passengers." — Bob Monkhouse "A modest man, who has much to be modest about." — Winston Churchill (of Clement Atlee) "If you are going through hell, keep going." — Winston Churchill "I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long." — Mitch Hedberg "Take my wife—please." — Henny Youngman " It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried." Winston Churchill "You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else." Winston Churchill This also includes the “humourous triple”, where two or more leading things in a sequence establish a pattern, with the last item being something unexpected.
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Comments
The Senior Lord of the House Paraprosdokian is too wretchedly ill to consider the above witticism for promotion at this time.
These interst me, i've never heard of them before!
but how is the word pronounced?
Ha! Read the earlier pages to view the Battle Royal between me and Bailey over its pronunciation.
The humble Finrod offers his sincere best wishes for the Senior Lord's speedy recovery from whatever ailment afflicts her (abases himself in the full nine-fold kowtow).
I do this an awful lot, some might say too much. I didn't know it had its own word.
Ah, but as belacqua points out on page 1 of this thread:
"An interesting discussion to catch up on. Now, just one, totally boring question: has anyone actually managed to find a reliable (read: printed) reference for this word anywhere? And claims on the Wikipedia talk page that those exist don't count (couldn't verify those for lack of JSTOR access)."
I think Bailey and I (especially) were having far too much fun with it to let that little fact get in the way. I still can't read the earlier posts around "If anybody wants me, I'll be under a train." without breaking into laughter.
Now we can edit comments, all that's gone. Ah well.
I would have to agree that the binary joke is paraprosdokian. One of my favorites will always be "When life gives you lemons, stuff 'em down your bra and make bigger boobs."
Ha! I just bought Anguished English by Richard Lederer (I absolutely adore word books, and I particularly like Mr. Lederer’s style) and it has some of the most excellent paraprosdokians involving reports of car wrecks.
One of my favorites is “The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.”
Reading through these pages on this lonely night has been a joy. I thank Finrod and Bailey. Oh, linguists… I do love them.
Ah, the lady NimbleMarmoset is too kind!
I must admit, we've had more joy here out of this Hellenic construction than I could possibly have imagined.
And, Senior Lord Bailey, if you're still not feeling 100%, your acolytes send you unconditional love - and ferrets.
I just came up with this on the bestuff haiku page:
The wind rustles leaves
But cowboys rustle cattle;
Isn't language odd?
I wonder if ferrets are really the best things to send to an unsuspecting sick person.
They do seem to have helped a smidge.
Well, I am feeling better. I'm just not sure I want to give the credit to the large pack of marauding rodents that was apparently unleashed on me while I was lying in bed hoping for death.
No one said it would be easy.
you must eat CORN flakes for breakfast
Variation of Melissa’s lemon-related paraprosdokian (which I heartily enjoyed btw): “When life gives you lemons…just shut up and eat the damn lemons!”
Just found this:
"Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you'll be surprised at how little you have".
-Ernest Haskins
I just remembered a couple from Garrison Keillor’s Pretty Good Joke Book:
“He who hesitates is often right.”
“The best-laid plans of mice and men…are filed away somewhere.”
I think it was Sholem Aleichem who pointed out - many years ago - that many proverbs have... what shall I call them?...inverses.
He who hesitates is lost... whatever happened to Look before you leap?
It also reminded me of something my mother said when I was explaining some point about English school management to her. When I'd finished, she shook her head disapprovingly and said, "Too many cooks and not enough Indians."
Which is probably the best way to describe the situation.
Reminds me of Reggie Perrin and Sunshine Desserts and CJ in the Rise and fall of Reggie Perrin = Stick it in the seed tray and see if the budgie bites.
Indeed, there are some pairs of proverbs that flat-out contradict one another!
How about “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” versus “Out of sight, out of mind?”
Ah, yes… Translate the latter into Chinese characters and translate it back and you get 'invisible idiot.'
why did you do that? i mean its kinda amuzing and all that but how did you find out?
'Cos I speak Cantonese (Hong Kong Chinese).
Still ….. A stange thing to do
Invisible idiot! :D
"You can't abdicate and eat it."
-Wallis Simpson, wife of the former King Edward VIII
I think I just inadvertantly made one on MSN messenger. "I got burnt in the tanning bed. My new shoes gave me horrible blisters. Nobody loves me." Does that count?
Here's one of mine (from Appropriately Used Apostrophes):
"Now please excuse me, I've been typing in Mathematics for hours and I need a short break. Probably between the 1st and 2nd cervical vertebrae."
Finrod has a cervix!
I know, it's just when you said that it reminded me of my biology class in middle school. When we were learning about the skeletal system this one girl raised her hand and was like "So… boys have cervixes? And I HAVE TWO?"
Wouldn’t it actually be “cervices?” ;)
Dear god, that conjures up a mental vision! Imagine the misspelt sign: "Welcome to the church. Cervices at 10.30am and 6.30pm"
Seriously, iyp, either is OK (Chambers).
The plural of index is indices. The plural of matrix is matrices. Why, then, isn't the singular form of disease disix?
Let's not dwell on the subject of singular diseases... the plural of forum is fora, but that doesn't mean I can't log in at forums.bestuff.com.
I wince every time I see the address, but I've learned to live with it.
On this subject (but not on our main theme) I've just tracked this down:
Remember, though box in the plural makes boxes,
The plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.
And remember, though fleece in the plural is fleeces,
That the plural of goose isn't gooses, nor geeses.
And remember, though house in the plural is houses,
The plural of mouse should be mice, not mouses.
Mouse, it is true, in the plural is mice,
But the plural of house should be houses, not hice
And foot, it is true, in the plural is feet,
But the plural of root should be roots, and not reet.
Similarly, I find it disappointing that I can call someone I dislike a louse, but I cannot call two or more scoundrels lice. Maybe that's mean spirited of me. I don't know.
Meanwhile, back on the subject of paraprosdokians, I almost forgot one of my all time favorites: "That which does no kill us makes us stranger." Funny, yet true.
Indeed. But "lice" is so much more visceral! It's not something you hear much here either, btw. I like to keep my options open where being obnoxious is concerned.
Absolutely right. I've recently unleashed a torrent of invective against our local authority.
Incidentally, what do you think of: "That which does not kill us makes us stringier." ?
"That which does not kill me must have missed me."
I wish I could take credit for that, but it's not mine.
"The taciturn manage, to say the least."
Oh Finrod, does your wittiness ever end?
.... does it ever begin
Are you ever nice?